The Dance of Opposition: Bridging Competition and Cooperation

What really sits at the opposite end of competition? It's tempting to say cooperation, right? But here's a twist: cooperation needs a bit of elbow grease – agency, communication, and coordination. None of these are must-haves for competition’s opposite. Think about it: does competition always need a director? Not really. Picture genes vying for dominance, à la "The Selfish Gene". No need for a mastermind there. Or consider market dynamics. They might boil down to human actions, but it’s not a strict requirement. Take a forest, for instance. It’s like a battleground, where each tree and plant jostles for sunlight and nutrients. But does this struggle hinge on the trees being conscious agents? That’s a hot topic when we talk about plant identity and individuality.

Now, back to cooperation. It screams agency, doesn’t it? But let’s slice the term a bit. Think of it as co-operation: multiple actions interweaving simultaneously. This leans more towards coordination, or maybe just things occurring side by side. Viewing a forest through this lens shifts the perspective. Instead of a scramble for resources, we see a networked community, each member contributing to a collective thrive-fest.

So, what’s the broader picture here? It’s a spectrum ranging from stark individualism to all-encompassing unity. On one end, you've got the extreme breakup – down to atoms, maybe – each doing its own thing. Complex systems, like life or the universe, might emerge from these solo acts. The other end? Total integration. Picture a world where everything’s interconnected, maybe to the point of losing individual identities. Everything's part of a greater whole, a single unit.

Integration's a slippery term, though. It can spring from competition too – think of one country swallowing another post-war. But are there other spectrums to consider? Strip away the rivalry from competition, and you're left with independent happenings. Remove agency from cooperation, and you land at a relational web where everything relies on everything else. It seems we're circling back to the same spectrum after all.

The Forest as Metaphor: Competing and Cooperating in Nature

Forests embody two distinct viewpoints: competitive and cooperative. In the competitive view, trees battle for sunlight, with the tallest ones overshadowing and outcompeting their neighbours for this vital resource. Lower layers adapt to this scarcity, each straining to capture what little light filters through. This perspective mirrors the cutthroat dynamics of market competition and Darwinian evolution, casting the forest as an arena of individualistic struggle.

In contrast, the cooperative approach sees the forest as a symphony of mutual support. Here, tall trees collaborate to form a protective canopy, shielding the undergrowth from harsh elements like rain and wind, while moderating extreme temperatures. This cooperative nature becomes tangible in the cool refuge forests provide on hot days.

However, this duality sets the stage for a third perspective, drawn from indigenous philosophy: relational ontology. This approach doesn't start with isolated entities in competition or collaboration. Instead, it views the forest as an integrated system, where the distinction between individual trees blurs. Interconnected by their roots, often across species, these trees form a network where life persists even beyond death. This interconnectivity challenges the competitive narrative, revealing the forest not as a collection of solitary fighters but as a cohesive, interconnected community.

Beyond the Self: Exploring Relational Identity and Holistic Connections

My exploration into caring about one's identity beyond the private sphere, under the theme of relational identity, stems from a quest to understand the concept itself. This journey began with Anne Salmond's 'Tears of Rangi,' particularly her intriguing assertion that God is an analytic logician. To paraphrase Salmond's ideas, Māori philosophy presents a holistic, relational view of existence. It posits that concepts exist in tandem with their opposites, such that invoking one inherently activates its counterpart. This approach challenges the Cartesian notion of an individual as a distinct entity, separated from the world by the mere boundaries of their skin.

Drawing from the spiralling imagery of the koru, Māori philosophy suggests that identity is influenced by both past and future elements. It encompasses not just our bloodline ancestors but also spiritual entities and geographical features. Identity, in this view, is an integral part of a comprehensive, relational network.

This perspective is particularly enlightening when considering identity in the context of the LGBTQ+ community. The act of 'coming out' transcends mere declarations of sexual orientation or preference. It signifies the establishment of a position within a complex web of relationships. It encompasses the historical struggles and societal challenges faced by rainbow communities, including acts of violence and societal exclusion. But it also involves the relationships one forms and the recognition — legal, societal, and communal — of these relationships. This holistic understanding of queer identity goes far beyond mere sexual practices in the private sphere. To do so would be to overlook the full, interconnected narrative of one's life.

I don’t care vs I care not

The phrase “I don’t care what you do in your bedrooms” often raises the question: does it signify tolerance as in “I’m okay with whatever you do in your bedroom,” or does it imply a desire for ignorance, “I care not to know what you do in your bedroom”? This interpretation suggests a boundary where personal activities are accepted as long as they remain unshared and private. This stance advocates for the discretion of one’s private affairs, especially those of a sexual nature, deeming it socially inappropriate to publicize intimate details.

The concept operates smoothly for those whose identities align with societal norms. Heterosexual individuals, for instance, are not compelled to announce their sexual orientation, as their behaviors and appearances typically do not challenge the status quo. Thus, for them, Trudeau's slogan may simply underscore the principle of maintaining sexual privacy. However, this perspective overlooks a crucial distinction for queer individuals: revealing one’s queer identity is not an overshare of sexual life but an integral part of their lived experience.

In societal interactions, such as attending social events with partners, queer individuals inadvertently disclose aspects of their private lives that heterosexual individuals do not. This difference highlights that a queer life is not merely a 'normal' life with an alternate sexual preference; it is an existence that encompasses every facet of being. Therefore, coming out is not about revealing bedroom activities, but rather about sharing one's true self and the entirety of one's life experiences.

I don’t care what you do in your bedroom

14/11/23

Pierre-Eliot Trudeau, the former Canadian Prime Minister, was a pivotal figure in the 1970s for decriminalising homosexuality. He famously stated that the government should not meddle in the nation's bedrooms, implying that what consenting adults do in private is not a matter for governmental scrutiny. This forward-thinking attitude was especially empowering for the queer community, enabling them to forge a significant existence within their community. Once their sexuality was decriminalised, they began addressing discrimination in workplaces, eventually leading to the achievement of marriage equality in the 2000s.

A recent example of this ongoing dialogue is Felix Auger-Aliassime, a prominent Canadian tennis player, who suggested a voluntary survey on the pro tour to anonymously identify members of the rainbow community. Notably, there are no openly gay male players on the tour. While several celebrated female players have come out, significantly influencing the community, the number of openly gay players remains minimal.

Reacting to Auger-Aliassime's announcement on Facebook, some echoed a modern variant of Trudeau's sentiment: "I don't care what you do in your bedroom, I only care about how well you play tennis." This attitude, akin to a contemporary "don't ask, don't tell" policy, seems accepting but actually limits the expression and recognition of diverse queer identities. It reduces the act of coming out to a mere declaration of sexual preference, ignoring the broader implications of being queer. Queer identity involves more than just sexuality; it's about how individuals present themselves, form relationships, and contribute to their communities.

From a relational identity viewpoint, the "I don’t care what you do in your bedroom" stance falls short. It overlooks the importance of openly living and expressing a range of queer identities, and the need for acceptance and respect in doing so.